Pseudo Psapphic Ode

The Napowrimo prompt a few days ago was for a poem in Sapphic metre.  Being devoid of inspiration I had the idea of writing a Sapphic Ode, as you do.   I read the instructions on the Napo page, Then I read the example given and the rhythm sounded lumpy to me. 

The recipe was: quatrains whose first three lines have eleven syllables, and the fourth, just five. There is also a very strict meter that alternates trochees (a two-syllable foot, with the first syllable stressed, and the second unstressed) and dactyls (a three-syllable foot, with the first syllable stressed and the remainder unstressed). The first three lines consist of two trochees, a dactyl, and two more trochees. The fourth line is a dactyl, followed by a trochee.Thus a stanza would read as:

Dum di dum di dum diddy dum di dum di   x3
Dum diddy dum di

Far be it from me to criticise such an ancient form, but I think it is frightfully bad style to end a stanza (and poem) on a weak beat.  So I consulted Wikipedia and recoiled before a page of gobbledook.  

Never one to give up at the first hurdle, I had a go, but instead of giving up, my horse fell at the first jump line

Poetry should be a pleasure
Rhythm dance in every measure
Words beguile as jewelled treasure
Not a rigid straitjacket.

Ah well, I tried.

About https://vivinfrance.wordpress.com

All poetry, prose and pictures posted here, except where otherwise stated, is my own, and may only be used elsewhere with my expressed permission. Please don't be inhibited from correcting my bloopers and making suggestions: Most of what I post here is instant, ill-considered and off-the-cuff, in serious need of editing.
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4 Responses to Pseudo Psapphic Ode

  1. You’ve so much more poetic patience than I…big kudos to you, Viv! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. colonialist says:

    Much better thus!
    If one took::
    Poetry should be rhythmic’ly giving pleasure
    It would amount to an oxymoron!

    Liked by 1 person

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