Common Moles in Common Meter

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The moles are ruining our lawn
with mountains everywhere .
Of the devil they are the spawn.
I wish they’d go elsewhere.

I will not call them simple hills –
a mountain range is no
hyperbole, does not fulfil
the spread and size and so

if perfect lawn is now desired
instead of landscape lunar,
drastic action is required
at once, if not sooner

Petrol poured on every heap
will do the trick, I think.
A lighted match will make them leap;
invaders soon extinct.

 
Contrary to my usual green viewpoint….   Poems in common metre are the order of the day at Mindlovesmiery’s Menagerie – alternate iambic tetrameter/trimeter, à la Emily Dickinson.

 

 


About https://vivinfrance.wordpress.com

All poetry, prose and pictures posted here, except where otherwise stated, is my own, and may only be used elsewhere with my expressed permission. Please don't be inhibited from correcting my bloopers and making suggestions: Most of what I post here is instant, ill-considered and off-the-cuff, in serious need of editing.
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11 Responses to Common Moles in Common Meter

  1. That seems a little harsh!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. catterel says:

    We tried putting inverted plastic bottles into their holes. The wind reverberates in the bottles and down the tunnels, and scares the moles away … into the neighbours’ gardens. At least, that’s the theory. The upside is that the moles have aerated the soil for you and won’t need to scarify your lawn!

    Like

  3. Ron. says:

    I thought you might like this one, V:

    Cold Buffet

    The moles won’t sleep, or try to sleep;
    the moles will only tunnel deep
    beneath the garden’s snow. They know
    the highway-builder’s art, and go

    where, also deep, the tasty seeds
    await the heat and light they need.
    It’s sad; so many seeds must meet their fate
    because the moles won’t hibernate.

    Like

  4. thehutts says:

    I don’t like the idea of petrol at all – you are polluting the soil and groundwater. I am sure there are better ways of getting rid of them. I will do some research. We have Mole catchers in Northumberland and I have found a UK website of contacts:
    http://www.mole-catcher.co.uk/

    Like

    • There used to be an old mole catcher in Cerisy but he died a few years ago. It truly is a problem here – our garden is about 30 feet by 20 and there are almost more molehills than grass.

      We’re waiting for a dry day to rake an even cover of mole soil all over, but dry days are few and far between in January! A friend of ours heard that moles didn’t like the smell of sour milk, so they put some into the holes every morning. Then they heard a neighbour complaining that X was crazy – they fed moles!

      Like

  5. what a nuisance they are although I’m not sure I would advise the petrol trick!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. If that really works then we’ll try it here. They are driving my husband crazy!!!

    Like

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