OctPoWriMo and myth

Why do we put ourselves through this torture?  Today’s prompt from OctPoWriMo gives us three words for a free verse poem:  caterpillar, chrysalis, butterfly.  Here’s mine.

Brief interlude of precious time
awaits emergence from chrysalis
of butterfly before extinction
so make the most of it.

 and at dVerse, they would like a modern take on myth:  Here’s mine:

Without evolution
ancient myth of creation
defies belief.

I know it’s right to shrink my poetry, but have I gone too far?

About https://vivinfrance.wordpress.com

All poetry, prose and pictures posted here, except where otherwise stated, is my own, and may only be used elsewhere with my expressed permission. Please don't be inhibited from correcting my bloopers and making suggestions: Most of what I post here is instant, ill-considered and off-the-cuff, in serious need of editing.
This entry was posted in formal poetry, free verse, haiku and senryu. Bookmark the permalink.

27 Responses to OctPoWriMo and myth

  1. siggiofmaine says:

    Love seeing you here ! The new system of no emails and the post feeds is difficult for me to use in a timely manner…
    and gave up and went to the facebook sites I can find… do miss seeing you and seeing dverse.

    Peace and love… hope all has bee well with you and your family.

    Like

    • Wot new system? I still get emails of posts on all the blogs I follow? I thought I hadn’t seen you around. Facebook is all very well, but I much prefer blogging. Have you looked at your own settings? I will pop over to your blog and see what’s what.
      Love,
      ViV

      Like

  2. Bastet says:

    A great haiku Viv .. and a perfect response!

    Like

  3. Abhra says:

    Interesting thought there – glad you could join my prompt.

    Like

  4. Tamara Woods says:

    Short and sweet. I like a concentrated message that’s well-excuted.

    Like

  5. “Without evolution
    ancient myth of creation
    defies belief.”

    So true and short enough to quote here to give a direct look while writing too..:)

    And i do believe this to be true.. as the further i got into advanced subjects of science the greater.. and still greater my belief in the GOD OF NATURE GROWS..

    EVOLUTION IS only the start for me.. now the golden spiral mean of 1.618 seen in galaxies same at the quantum physics level of small at precisely same mean.. tells me that this Universe is so dam fined tuned that yes.. ALLITIS as one synchronized FORCE IS AT PLAY EVERYWHERE AND EVERYHOW..NOW!..2..:)!

    HAVE a great night..now.. Viv in France poem 2!..:)

    Like

  6. jazzytower says:

    It’s just right and I enjoyed it! :)-

    Like

  7. Very well done, both of them…..good work, Viv!

    Like

  8. zoebyrd says:

    I am with what Lance and others said. Concise is good… you managed to keep the romantic integrity of what I think of as poetry… really lovely

    Like

  9. LauraALord says:

    Beautiful take on the myth.

    Like

  10. Lance says:

    I say shrinking is good. When you can get the message across in fewer words, it’s good for the readers as well as the writer.

    Like

  11. claudia says:

    what makes the myths come alive is the relevance they have today when we can identify with them or learn from the lessons they teach us

    Like

  12. Glenn Buttkus says:

    Your courage & cleverness needs to be applauded; but as to “belief”, too often is shares the crib with “faith”–belief through ignorance, acceptance through persuasion, & I have never been able to fully abide the nationalistic, religious, political, corporate bullshit mandates & myths that have been force fed to the masses since before Eden, Atlantis, or Lemuria.

    Like

  13. Short and sweet is perfectly fine, nothing saying you have to write an epic every you play with your words on OctPoWriMo! 😀 Thanks for sharing with us!

    Like

  14. MarinaSofia says:

    Your extreme succinctness makes me laugh – but it certainly doesn’t divert from the serious intent, cleverness and simple beauty of your poems!

    Like

  15. Mary says:

    However creation happened, it happened…and ha, that is enough for me. In earlier times I used to struggle with the specifics but now I just accept what is!

    Like

  16. Sumana Roy says:

    both done cleverly…

    Like

  17. challenges make you stretch your poetry muscles, which you do so well on a regular basis! Being the lazy poet I am, I will be a spectator for October.

    Like

  18. Shrinking is good.. Personally I think I’m too wordy sometimes.. Myths of creation – so easy to believe in if you reject evolution.. Then you’re free to choose your favorite myth 😉

    Like

  19. Misky says:

    No you haven’t gone too far, Viv. I like brief but highly concentrated pieces that make me think. I’d like to see a lot of the stuffing chucked out of some poems. I love these two poems.

    Like

  20. ManicDdaily says:

    Hi Viv–I do not think you’ve gone too far. Of course, a short poem demands that the reader pay attention as there is a lot crammed in to these–the “defies belief” is so very clever here as well as musical, and the extinction of time also. Concentrated and well done. k.

    Like

  21. brian miller says:

    we will always have our stories…the myths change though….it was movies…and now i think our myths tie more to gaming and tech…because we can be them for a few minutes (or hours) in the game…esp with first person views…

    Like

I love it when you leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s