I m prone to making things difficult for myself: combining the heteroclite collection of words in Brenda’s Wordle with a rhyming form chosen from today’s Octpowrimo prompt: My iambs are hardly classic, but the poem can certainly be read as 4 stressed syllables to the line.
| The Duo-rhyme, a poetic form created by Mary L. Ports, is a 10 or 12-line poem, with the first two and last two lines having the same rhyme scheme, and the center of the poem (lines #3 through #8 or #10) having their own separate monorhyme scheme, written in iambic tetrameter with a rhyme scheme: 10-line:a,a,b,b,b,b,b,b,a,a and 12-line: a,a,b,b,b,b,b,b,b,b,a,a. adapted from the definition at Shadow Poetry |
In inky black of moonless night
waking dreams of immeasurable light
I bend my vision of this world of clay
erode the fear that the dark will stay,
in the knowledge that the day
will come at last to laugh and play
still safe and yet we yearn to stray,
gathering pebbles where they lay
bathed in sunshine, along the bay
skipping and splashing through the spray
as we glory in earthly sight,
awaiting time for heavenward flight.
Vivinfrance's Blog 
Excellent for both, Viv!
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I am SO impressed!
in the knowledge that the day
will come at last to laugh and play
~ I love the positiveness in these lines! Wish we could know that everyday would be like this.
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LOVE IT.
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It makes perfect sense! Love the rhyming!!
erosion
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Once again, Viv, you amaze me with your command of forms. The rhythm was beautiful.
The final two lines were the perfect ending. I am reminded that not only the earth is clay, but often our feet are the same… Amy
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this is amazing! A great read 🙂
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Wow!! I so enjoy your work! Wonderfully done!
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Your work has always been so acute and biting clever.. and I feel that since you had your accident, your work has sharpened and deepened even more.. c
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There is nothing of the flummoxed here, Viv. This one dances, then runs and plays. Whew! Hats off to you, may you continue to shine…
Elizabeth
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Impressive, and I know how hard it is to fit in strings of the same rhyming word – never mind having a Wordle thrown in to complicate matters as well!
Just one thing I wondered about – isn’t there a tense change with ‘lay’ ?
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Lay can be present or past. Take your pick.
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No, it actually has a different meaning in present.- as ‘place on top of’. At least, that’s what my Mommy and all my references have told me.
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As I lay on my bed of sickness (now or last week) I ponder the pecularities of the English language. Of course it should be lie in the present, but that wouldn’t rhyme!
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Yes. The whole lay and lie thing, from tables to eggs to untruths, is one of the worst.
If one wanted to be passionately pedantic, I suppose one could scrape by with:
… yearn to stray
To gather pebbles where they lay ….
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You say “either” and I say “eye-ther…”!!
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No, I say ‘eye-the’ as well! Though ‘ee-the’ is not in the same class of horrible as toe-may-toe …
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agreed.
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I read this through a few times and each time announced “breathtaking”.
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Ooh, this is mesmerizing 🙂
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It’s funny it doesn’t always have to make sense…one will come along and make sense for us. I enjoyed reading this one.
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Your wisdom and gift of rhyme and meter amaze me! I can’t imagine pulling off anything so lyrical! 🙂
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a quick and singing mind at work (play?) makes rhymes dance here today 🙂 Thanks for the lovely poem born of ‘challenges’ crafted in art.
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I hear you Viv… finding the rhyme is never difficult, it’s creating something with them that’s the hard bit, and you’ve done that here. I want to be running along that beach. 🙂
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I found this piece quite beautiful and am amazed the words were so kind to you. (Or you were kind to them perhaps?)
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What a lofty ending. And brave of you to take on a form.
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Finding the rhymes was easy, it was making them make sense that flummoxed me!
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